Sunday, January 18, 2009
On being transparent
So, the blogs I read the most are the ones where the writers are very transparent and open about their lives, their joys, their faults, etc... Here is my attempt to give you a small glimpse at what God has been working in and out of me over the past month.
Brett and I have been married for almost 3 years now. I know...long time right? There's so many new things just in that first year....getting used to each other in a whole different way, Brett seeing me without make-up and smelling my morning breath, etc.... One of the new things that at the time I didn't realize was going to be so "new" for me was being the wife of someone in ministry. Now I knew when we got married that Brett was going to be in ministry and that he had so many dreams and visions of ministry. I didn't think this would be that big of a step for me because I had worked at a church, volunteered in church ministries, and basically just been in church and loved anything and everything to do with the church since jr. high. But...I was a little naive to this and to be honest I have spent much of the past 3 years trying to figure out what this role looks like...what am I supposed to do? What am I not supposed to do? I began to feel a little lost because unlike most things in my life I couldn't read a book, get training, or take a class! They don't exactly offer classes on ministry wives 101 or have tons of books in this area. I am a borderline perfectionist...wanting to be the best wife, best friend, best teacher, best EVERYTHING and my perfectionist tendencies sure weren't making my life any easier in this role.
Over the past month God has taken me on a journey to help me begin to make more sense of what it is He has called me to. It started with a "conversation" with Brett in which I probably wasn't the most encouraging person of all time. After this conversation I really felt God speaking to me and challenging me to encourage Brett like never before...so I gave myself a goal....."Encourage him for 10 minutes everyday for the next 31 days." I know...some of you are probably like, "geez....do you not do that?" Well, life gets busy and if I'm not intentional about it sometimes it just doesn't happen. Brett and I both go 90 mph some days and if I'm not intentional it just plain out doesn't happen. Well, I'm sure you can guess what happened? I began to see our marriage and life in ministry together catalyst to something I have never seen.
I began to read Lori's blog and learn about how to really support Brett. I have gone through a prayer journey for Brett at the Ingram blog. And here's what I have figured out so far about this role: 1. If you aren't intentional nothing gets done. 2. If you think you pray for your husband a lot-pray more. 3. God has called you to be his wife and did so for a very specific reason. 4. If you are afraid -it will only keep you from blessing. 5. You can learn from people who have been doing it longer than you. 6. You can encourage him for MORE than 10 minutes and definitely for more than 31 days:)
Life is good and I love learning.